The Evil Eye: Buree Nazar Waale Tera Bhi Bhala

"An evil eye can see no good" - Danish Proverb

It had rained rather poured the evening I went into labour. Despite the inconvenience my family doctor had to go through to reach the hospital in time, and the excruciating labour pain, I consider that evening to be the most fortunate one of my life.

As I reached home after getting discharged from the hospital, my Mom rushed to the kitchen and returned with a tray (comprising of seven dried and intact red chillies, a handful of table salt and a small amount of mustard seeds) in her hand. I could see her lips moving, she was chanting a prayer apparently. She signaled to me to pass my little bundle of joy to her. I complied. As Mom held the little infant in her arms, her eyes beamed with joy. Continuing her chant, she carefully took the red chillies, salt and mustard seeds in her fist, and encircled it around my baby boy (head to toe) seven times. Having done so, she went into the kitchen and burnt the ingredients to ashes in a ceremonial fire. What my Mom did was a small ritual to ward-off any or all evil wandering around her dearest grandson.

Dear readers, although I can recall every second of my child’s birth, the afore-mentioned incident was narrated to me by my Mom when I called her in the midst of writing this article, as I wanted to get the details right.

During my 45 days of postpartum confinement, warding off all negative energies from my kid became a regular part of his existence. In Latin American countries, the ‘jaapaa’ period is called as ‘cuarentena’ which means ‘quarantine’ in English. Yes, the most familiar dreaded word of this year, 2020. During the recent times of COVID-19, forget about new mommies, every person (special mention to males) has probably had a taste of it and would never feel the need to Google it. It is not that I have never witnessed or heard about evil eye and the damage it causes as well as the measures to avoid or cast it off, it was just that now I was closely observing it. Guess, that’s what motherhood does to a woman, she just wants to protect her innocent creation from everyone and everything existing and non-existing. Slowly, as the confinement period was drawing to a close, I felt that I had somehow learnt quite a few methods of warding-off evil spirits myself. My mother never taught me, but as I just said we mothers automatically become more observant and are quick to grasp anything that might help us to keep our children (lifeline if I might say) protected. Little had I known that there was in fact an auspicious day of the week and time frame that were believed to be more powerful or significant for carrying out this ritual. There were several ways with different ingredients and different complexity level by which this ritual to ward-off evil could be performed. There were members in the family who were considered to be more experienced and effective person to carry it out. There were different ‘talismans' or ‘amulets’ that were considered potent in keeping these negative powers at bay. Almost all mothers, in fact everyone who came to bless my son advised me to practice this ritual. They in fact told me to do so the moment they left so that even their glare did not do any harm to my kid. Trust me, every time a visitor left, I rushed to the kitchen and I meticulously repeated the same process that my Mother had on the first day. Amulets in the form of black threads were tied around my kid’s neck, wrists, waist and ankles, and they became a part of his body. They were changed before they wore out without fail. I used to put a black spot (nazar ka kaala teeka) on his forehead every day after having given him a bath and changing into fresh clothes.

Being brought up with scientific temper, initially I followed it not because I firmly believed it, but probably I was scared for my son’s safety. After all, I was a new mom with no practical experience. As far as I knew or came across mothers, every mom educated, uneducated, working, homemaker, young, old, rich or poor was doing it without second thoughts. Moreover, I looked at it as one harmless way to keep my son protected. Having nothing to lose. It somehow gave me a psychological boost that my munchkin was safe. Did I really see it working? I will be honest, I did; many a times. In one of a very early incident that I remember, my son was crying incessantly for couple of hours just after his feed. All methods to console him were tried, but in vain. Distressed with the constant wailing of my son, the thought to perform this ritual at that moment didn’t occur to me. It was only when a middle-aged aunty coincidentally happened to visit us, remarked didn’t you cast-off the evil eye? I shook my head as if confessing that how could I forget! She offered to do the same and I witnessed that even before the completion of the process, my wailing baby was not only quiet, but smiling and was trying to jump-off from my arms as if nothing had happened. It worked may be because of the strong belief of that kind woman. Haven’t we all heard the famous quote “When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it”. Probably, the one who performs the ritual to ward-off evil, prays with such an intensity and positivity for the well-being of that little kid, that the entire universe is forced to work towards healing him almost instantly. For those of you whose overtly scientific mind doesn’t allow to fully believe in the process, there’s a plethora of literature waiting to be discovered, only if you decide to Google it.

After the first three months of my delivery, performing this ritual again took a backseat. The reason could be Me and my child moved in with my husband (just the three of us), and there was no direct pressure of carrying out this ritual every day. Probably, with time I started becoming comfortable with being a Mom and not freaking out every time my kiddo cried after a full stomach. Moreover, we rarely had any visitors. Well, me and my hubby aren’t anti-social, it is just that we are selectively social (pun unintended). Thus, slowly the ritual shifted from few fixed day basis to weekly and then monthly. Eventually, regular prayers offered to 'The Almighty' for my kid’s well-being took over warding off the evil eye almost completely. I was reminded of it once in a while by the characteristic burning smell of red chillies that filled the air of the campus where I stayed (especially at midnight). Yes, the place where I stay, almost every house is echoing with the laughter of a child. A kid of my son’s age, a little younger or maybe older.

Whenever my son became sick, the discussion on this ritual became somehow inevitable. For instance, one day my housemaid came home and the moment she came to know that my son was taken ill, the first thing she asked was to ward-off evil eye from over my son. I told her Oh! come on, everyone here has a kid and when I never look at someone’s kid with jealousy why would someone else do the same to my kid? She said, it doesn’t work this way, evil spirits exist for sure as people look at other’s kid sometime with lots of love and sometime with envy that why our kid isn’t like him/her, and it’s the latter which does a lot of harm to the child. You should practice warding off these evil spirits every single day without fail. To be honest, this perspective never occurred to me (I really hope that my society people don’t try to find out who that housemaid was).

Today, when my baby is a toddler, I sometime do follow the practice of warding off evil eye not out of fear, but as a last resort when I don’t see medicines working. You can still see my kid with a black spot on his forehead, not because I am scared that my prayers won’t do what this spot can do for him, but simply because he wants it to be put. He makes it a point that I put it every day. I also never question a mother’s belief if she takes it as a first resort, because I have seen those believes moving mountains. Do I believe in the existence of an evil power? Well, if good and bad, positive and negative, belief and disbelief, truth and lie, black and white, friend and foe can coexist, then I’ve no reason to not believe that God and devil can coexist too.

To conclude, I just like all mothers only want my kid to remain protected, and if a simple, harmless, age-old tried and tested ritual can assist in his well-being, then I see no reason to doubt it. As I write this article, there will be thousands of mothers around the world warding off the evil spirits from over their children (irrespective of their gender and age). I only wish that their prayer seeking well-being of their own isn’t at the cost of someone else’s. May the Supreme power above, keep every single child shielded from all the negativities that fill the world. Amen!

Love,

A modern scientific mom, who sees no harm in abiding to some proven traditional beliefs for her kid’s well-being.

P.S. Dearest Shri, your mom never looks and will never look at a kid with malevolent glare because I have and will never compare you, your milestones, your success, your failures, your progress with anyone in this world. You are beyond comparisons for me, as you are just mine and I love you the way you are. Let me confess, the moment I complete writing this blog post, I would rush to perform this ritual one last time for the day.